One thing to clarify before I play catch up again on the book reviews. Before anyone jumps up and down telling me I've missed a book out. I know. I made the decision to read Amazing Maurice and the Tiffany Aching Books all together at the end of the run so that I can read all of Tiffany's story in one go, finishing with The Shephard's Crown. It seemed the most fitting end to the challenge - that's not to say I don't have the book. I do and it's teasing me to read it but I'm going to behave (besides there are other family members who want to read it so they'll be finished by the time I want it). So back to the reviews
Published: 2002
Plot Summery: On the morning of the 30th anniversary of the Glorious Revolution of the Twenty-Fifth of May (and as such the anniversary of the death of John Keel, Vimes' hero and former mentor), Sam Vimes is caught in a magical storm while pursuing Carcer Dun, a notorious criminal. He awakens to find that he has been rescued by Miss Palm (whom Vimes knows in the future as Mrs Palm, Head of the Guild of Seamstresses – seamstresses referring to prostitutes). He determines that he has somehow been sent back in time.
Vimes's first idea is to ask the wizards at the Unseen University to send him home, but before he can act on this, he is arrested for breaking curfew by a younger version of himself. Incarcerated in a cell next to his is Carcer, who after being released joins the Unmentionables, the secret police carrying out the paranoid whims of the Patrician of the time, Lord Winder.
When he is taken to be interrogated by the captain, time is frozen by Lu-Tze, who tells Vimes what has happened and that he must assume the identity of Sergeant-At-Arms John Keel, who was to have arrived that day but was murdered by Carcer. It is stated that the event which caused Vimes and Carcer to be sent into the past was a major temporal shattering. Vimes then returns to the office, time restarts and he convinces the captain that he is Keel.
Young Vimes believes Vimes to be Keel, allowing Vimes to teach Young Vimes the lessons for which Vimes idolized Keel. The novel climaxes in the Revolution. Vimes, taking command of the watchmen, successfully avoids the major bloodshed erupting all over the city and manages to keep his part of it relatively peaceful. After dealing with the Unmentionables' headquarters he has his haphazard forces barricade a few streets to keep people safe from the fighting between rebels and soldiers. However, the barricades are gradually pushed forward during the night (by Fred Colon and several other simple-minded watchmen) to encompass the surrounding streets until Vimes finds himself in control of a quarter of the city, dubbed "The Glorious People's Republic of Treacle Mine Road", with a still alive Reg Shoe as one of the leading figures.
The ruler, Lord Winder, is effectively assassinated by the young Assassin's Guild student Havelock Vetinari, and the new Patrician Lord Snapcase calls for a complete amnesty. However, he sees Keel as a threat and sends Carcer to lead a death squad of Unmentionables, watchmen and the palace guard to murder Keel. Several policemen (the ones who died when the barricade fell in the original timeline) are killed in the battle, as is Reg Shoe; Vimes manages to fight off the attack until he can grab Carcer, at which point they are returned to the future and Keel's body is placed in the timeline Vimes has just left, to tie things up, as in the "real" history, Keel died in that fight.
Vimes' son is born, with the help of Doctor "Mossy" Lawn, whom Vimes met while in the past, and Vimes finally arrests Carcer, promising him a fair trial before he is hanged. A subsequent conversation with Lord Vetinari reveals that the Patrician alone knows Vimes took Keel's place, also that he fought alongside Keel's men against Carcer's death squad. He proposes that the old Watch House at Treacle Mine Road (where Keel was sergeant, and which was destroyed by the dragon in Guards! Guards!) be rebuilt.
Adaptations: A five-part radio adaptation of the novel was broadcast on BBC Radio 4 from February 27, 2008
Favourite Quotes:
"Don't put your trust in revolutions. They always come around again. That's why they're called revolutions. People die, and nothing changes."
When Mister Safety Catch Is Not On, Mister Crossbow Is Not Your Friend."
“Hat = wizard, wizard = hat. Everything else is frippery.”
Reading Time: Started Saturday 1st August 2015 - Finished Wednesday 5th August 2015
Published: 2004
Plot Summery: The bulk of Monstrous Regiment takes place in the small, bellicose country of Borogravia, a highly conservative country, whose people live according to the increasingly psychotic decrees of its favored deity, Nuggan. The main feature of his religion is the Abominations; a long, often-updated list of banned things. To put this in perspective, these things include garlic, cats, the smell of beets, people with ginger hair, shirts with six buttons, anyone shorter than three feet (including children and babies), sneezing, rocks, ears, jigsaw puzzles, chocolate, and the colour blue.
The list of "Abominations Unto Nuggan" often causes conflicts with Borogravia's neighbours, and the uncertain whereabouts of Nuggan leads the inhabitants of Borogravia to deify their Duchess, to whom they pray instead. This slowly causes problems as, on the Discworld, belief grants power. Borogravia is in the midst of a war against an alliance of neighbouring countries, caused by a border dispute with the country of Zlobenia. Rumour is that the war is going poorly for Borogravia, though the country's leadership (and "everyone") denies it.
Polly Perks's brother Paul is missing in action after fighting in the Borogravian army. Paul is a bit slow and not altogether right in the head, and even though Polly is more qualified to take over the family business (a famous pub known as "The Duchess"), according to Nugganitic law, women cannot own property, so if Paul does not return, the pub will be lost to their drunken cousin when their father dies. Accordingly, Polly sets off to join the army in order to find him. Women joining the army are regarded as an Abomination Unto Nuggan, so Polly decides to dress up as a man (another Abomination) and enlists as Private Oliver Perks (taking her name from the folk song Sweet Polly Oliver).
While signing up, Polly encounters the repulsively patriotic Corporal Strappi, and the corpulent Sergeant Jackrum. Despite her apprehensions regarding Strappi, she kisses the Duchess - that is, she kisses a painting of said noble - and by doing so, joins up. Due to the shortage of troops, her fellow soldiers include a vampire named Maladict, a Troll named Carborundum, and an Igor named Igor. They also include "Tonker" Halter, "Shufti" Manickle, "Wazzer" Goom, and "Lofty" Tewt.
That night, Polly encounters a mysterious voice, which assures her that although he or she knows that Polly is a girl, they won't give her away. The voice also gives her some hints on how not to be discovered. Over the next few days, Polly makes a startling discovery: Lofty is also a girl. Since Lofty and Tonker are always together, Polly assumes that Lofty joined the army to follow her man, just like in "Sweet Polly Oliver". Later, she finds out that Shufti is another girl, and a pregnant one. She also joined the army to find her man; in this case, the father of her child, who she'd only known for a few days, and is known as Johnny.
Gradually, Polly discovers not only that everyone in her regiment, except Maladict, is a woman, but also confirmation of Borogravia's bleak situation. Most of her country's forces are captured or on the run, and food supplies are limited. This point is driven home when Igor (actually Igorina) demonstrates her surgery talents and saves several lives among a group of badly injured fleeing soldiers.
The regiment, under the leadership of their inexperienced commanding officer Lieutenant Blouse, makes its way toward the Keep where the enemy is based. Meanwhile, thanks to a chance encounter where the regiment unknowingly subdues and humiliates an elite enemy detachment, including Zlobenia's Prince Heinrich, their exploits become known to the outside world through William de Worde and his newspaper. Their progress particularly piques the interest of Commander Vimes, who is stationed with the alliance at the Keep. Vimes has his officers keep track of the regiment, occasionally secretly providing aid.
Polly and most of the regiment are able to infiltrate the Keep, disguising themselves as washerwomen, and once inside plot to release the captured Borogravian troops. They manage to do so, and Borogravia is able to retake much of the Keep, but when Polly admits they are women, their own forces remove them from the conflict and they are brought in front of a council of senior officers, where their fate will be decided. With the council about to discharge them and force them to return home, Jackrum barges in and intervenes, revealing that several of the military's top officers are actually women as well. But in the midst of this revelation, the Duchess, now raised to the level of a small deity by Borogravia's belief, takes brief possession of Wazzer, her most passionate believer. The Duchess urges all of the generals to quit the war and return home, to repair their country, returning their kiss of service, and ending their obligation to her.
In the aftermath of this event, Polly eventually discovers that even Jackrum himself is a woman. The regiment is sent to the enemy and successfully negotiates a truce, and military rules are changed so that women are allowed to serve openly and Maladict reveals himself as really being Maladicta. Polly finds her brother alive and well and returns home to The Duchess. One of her regiment "sisters" becomes the new leader of her country, having been driven by religious visions.
Sometime later, despite the peace they had desperately fought for, conflict breaks out again. Polly sneaks away from her profitable tavern to seek new ways to fight a war using the influence she gained and finds herself in the role of commander of boy-impersonating females who are marching off to war.
Adaptations: None Known
Favourite Quotes:
“Do you think it's possible for an entire nation to be insane?”
“The enemy isn't men, or women, it's bloody stupid people and no one has the right to be stupid.”
“It's not lying when you do it to officers!”
“It's lies. It's all lies. Some of them are just prettier than others, that's all. People see what they think is there.”
Reading Time: Started Thursday 6th August 2015 - Finished Tuesday 11th August 2015
